Fathers

I gave this talk in my ward in June, 2005, while living in Seattle. The talk is a good example of both my imperfect writing skills and the kinds of things I hope to post here.

Three Fathers

Each one of us that has ever lived on this earth, with one notable exception, has at least three fathers, some of us perhaps more. The father that all the world is aware of, though not always personally, is the father of your physical body. He is part of the means that provided the physical house for your spirit. Again, some fathers of the physical body may not be involved in the lives of their children for various reasons, but we can all be assured we have a biological father.

Besides a biological father some people on this earth may have an adopted father that plays the social role in one's life. While the biological fact is undeniable, to truly be a father in the sociological sense requires playing the role properly. Biology or sometimes law can make one a father in word, but true fatherhood is the result of a combination of satisfying cultural expectations of the role, including loving and caring for the children.

We've discussed only two types of fathers, but as we all have at least three, and many have a social and a biological father in one person, then who are the other two?

Our bodies house a spirit that also came into being through a father. And so, unlike the multitude of our biological fathers, we all have one common Heavenly Father, the father of our spirits. Who then is the third?

The Third Father

Jesus Christ, our Savior, who is, by the way, a notable exception because the father of his physical body and the father of his spirit is one and the same, is also our Father. Jesus Christ is the father of our salvation.1 As our Redeemer, he overcame physical and spiritual death. Since we will all partake of the resurrection, he is the Father of our salvation from physical death. However, as King Benjamin taught, we must take upon His name and promise to keep his commandments to be called the children of Christ, which promise we renew by partaking of the sacrament.2 Accepting Christ as our Father in this sense requires our acceptance and action. And there are other ways in which Christ could be considered our Father that we will not discuss today.

The Proclamation on the Family reemphasizes that the family is ordained of God, that it is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of his children, and it is by divine design that fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness.3 Being central to the plan, it is critical that we take seriously our roles in the family relationships we have on this earth, and also the roles we should be maintaining with our larger, spiritual family. In the Doctrine and Covenants section 130 verse 2 it states that "the same sociality which exists among us here will exist among us [in heaven], only it will be coupled with eternal glory, which glory we do not now enjoy." 4

So how are we who are called fathers to become better at our role? And for all of us, how are we to become better children, not only in regard to our earthly fathers, but most importantly, to our Heavenly Father? There is one relationship, greater than all the others in the scriptures which sets the perfect example for us. Sacred and beautiful in nature, the relationship between our Heavenly Father and His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ is the key to creating the sociality that must exist in our own families. But on this Father's Day, let's review what it teaches us about our relationship with our Father in Heaven.

The Relationship Between Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ

What we know about the relationship between Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ starts at the very beginning. When the Father presented His plan for His spirit children to be sent to earth to gain bodies and be tested, the role of Redeemer was being contested. In the book of Moses we read “that Satan … came before [the Father], saying—Behold, here am I, send me, I will be thy son, and I will redeem all mankind, that one soul shall not be lost, and surely I will do it; wherefore give me thine honor.”5

In sharp contrast, the Beloved Son—a term that tells us much about their relationship already—"which was my Beloved and Chosen from the beginning, said unto me—Father, thy will be done, and the glory be thine forever."6

From the very beginning we learn two critical things:

1. That Heavenly Father loved His Son and
2. The Son sought to do the Father's will and bring glory to Him.

Always Seeking the Father's Will

One of the earliest records of his life tells us that even at the age of 12 as he taught in the temple, he gently reminded his mother, concerned for his whereabouts, "Wist ye not I must be about my Father's business?"7 He spent the 40 days in the wilderness praying to His Father and fasting, preparing Himself. After the 40 days, the devil so cleverly tried to tempt the Savior with his barbed "If thou be the Son of God . . ."8 The Son had no questions as to his relationship with His Father in Heaven. He dismissed the temptation to prove it on Satan's terms and proceeded throughout His life to prove it through His Father's ways.9

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland in the April 1999 General Conference beautifully summarized some of the other insights into the Savior's relationship with His Father:

In all His mortal ministry Christ seems never to have had a single moment of vanity or self-interest. When one young man tried to call Him “good,” He deflected the compliment, saying only one was deserving of such praise, His Father.

In the early days of His ministry He said humbly, “I can of mine own self do nothing: … I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.”

Following His teachings, which stunned the audience with their power and authority, He would say: “My doctrine is not mine, but his that sent me. … I am not come of myself, but he that sent me is true.” Later he would say again, “I have not spoken of myself; but the Father which sent me, he gave me a commandment, what I should say, and what I should speak.”

To those who wanted to see the Father, to hear from God directly that Jesus was what He said He was, He answered, “If ye had known me, ye should have known my Father also: … he that hath seen me hath seen the Father.” When Jesus wanted to preserve unity among His disciples, He prayed using the example of His own relationship with God: “Holy Father, keep through thine own name those whom thou hast given me, that they may be one, as we are [one].”10

The Atonement

The defining moment of the relationship between the Father and His Only Begotten is the atonement. Long before the birth of the Beloved Son, another beloved son was born to Abraham by the name of Isaac. Abraham and Isaac received the agonizing blessing, designed to give us a glimpse, a deeper but no where near complete understanding of the heart-wrenching emotion of knowing you have the power to save your son, or even the power to save yourself, but submitting to the will of God instead. As Abraham was poised to sacrifice his willing son, the full understanding was abruptly stopped by the angel's voice.11 But unlike the joyful tears likely present as Abraham gratefully embraced his unhurt and alive son, very different tears were shed in the Garden of Gethsemane, The drops upon the earth there reflected the work of many knives; the sacrifice had to be completed.

Christ, in the hymn, pleads with His father to remove the cup, the bitter cup full of the pain and punishment of our sins. "Yet if thou wilt, I'll drink it up."12 He once again submits to His Father, seeking to please Him, to do the work which will bring glory to His Father. Elder Holland said it most beautifully:

"In that most burdensome moment of all human history, with blood appearing at every pore and an anguished cry upon His lips, Christ sought Him whom He had always sought -- His Father. "Abba," he cried, 'Papa,' or from the lips of a younger child, 'Daddy'.

This is such a personal moment it almost seems a sacrilege to cite it. A Son in unrelieved pain, a Father His only true source of strength, both of them staying the course, making it through the night--together."13

While the Savior was still suffering on the cross and to complete the atonement, He experienced the withdrawal of His Father. So close had they been throughout His life, that He cried, "Eloi, eloi lama sabachthani? My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"14 The Father withdrew from His Only Begotten so that He never need withdraw from us if we do not make ourselves unworthy of His presence.

His words at the very end of His experience with a mortal body and the terrible sacrifice match what he spoke from the very beginning: "Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit."15 He lived His life submitting to the will of the Father and in death, again submits Himself to Him. Perhaps amplified by His Father's withdrawal, His only desire was to return to be with Him, to return to His presence.

Yet again, even after he released himself from his racked and tormented mortal body and completed the sacrificial act, the Savior used his brief time in the spirit world before His resurrection to organize His Father's work to redeem the dead.16

After His resurrection, the Savior appeared to the Nephites, introduced by His Father's piercing voice which said: "Behold my Beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased, in whom I have glorified my name--hear ye him."17 The Son's desire to please His Father, to glorify his name had been fulfilled.

Teaching About the Father

The Savior continued ministering to the Nephites by teaching the same commandments he taught to the people on the other side of the world, the commandments that were given by the Father. He commanded them to be perfect, as their Father in heaven is perfect, though he could also have mentioned himself as an example as well.18 He taught them to pray, beginning with, "Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name." 19 He reminded them that “the fowls of the air, … they sow not, neither do they reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them.”20 And so, in doing the work of their Father, they would be supported and cared for, just as the Father cared for His beloved Son.

He used their own relationships with their children to emphasize the love of their Heavenly Father, saying, “If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?”21 He told them how those that were lost to men were not "lost unto the Father, for he knoweth whither he hath taken them."22 And then, as evidence so sacred of the love between the Father and His Beloved Son, and the love of the Father and His Son for the children of men, the Savior prayed to the Father for them.

And after this manner do they bear record: The eye hath never seen, neither hath the ear heard, before, so great and marvelous things as we saw and heard Jesus speak unto the Father;

And no tongue can speak, neither can there be written by any man, neither can the hearts of men conceive so great and marvelous things as we both saw and heard Jesus speak; and no one can conceive of the joy which filled our souls at the time we heard him pray for us unto the Father.

And it came to pass that when Jesus had made an end of praying unto the Father, he arose; but so great was the joy of the multitude that they were overcome.23

The Savior then taught his Disciples and prayed once again, saying:

Father, I pray not for the world, but for those whom thou hast given me out of the world, because of their faith, that they may be purified in me, that I may be in them as thou, Father, art in me, that we may be one, that I may be glorified in them.24

Just as the Father had been glorified in His Son, so will His Son be glorified in us as we truly become His disciples and submit to His will, being the exact same will of His Father, creating an eternal chain of glory.

Being a Father

How our Heavenly Father must love us, to give us the same opportunity to enjoy the beauty of the relationship He himself experiences. To have my own daughters who call me Daddy is a blessing and a responsibility that I cannot comprehend. As I reflect on my own relationship with them, I often wonder does my Father in Heaven look at me when I'm sleeping and marvel how I've grown? Does he laugh sometimes at the trivial nature of arguments? Does he wonder how I can find certain things so silly?

There are other questions I have considered when thinking of my blessing of being a father to which I can now answer. Does he smile and accept my imperfect but hand-made offerings given out of love and appreciation? Does he endure telling the story just one more time? Does he sound out a voice of alarm, warning of possible injury, when I am figuratively hanging on to a speeding, imbalanced shopping cart? Does he love me, even when I am so far away from Him? The answers to these questions is a resounding "Yes." Yes, he does.

I know that we have much to learn from the beautiful, sacred relationship between our Father in Heaven and our Savior, His Beloved Son. Jesus Christ, is the Son of God and He lives, as surely as God lives and loves us. Our Father in Heaven wants us to become like He is and sent His son to ensure we could do so. I know these things to be true and say them in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.